Plan for a different kind of spring cleaning

With spring only a week away, I’m starting to think about spring cleaning.  I like to think of spring as the New Year, because resolutions and goals I set at this time of year are so much easier to stick to.  Who really wants to eat veggies and exercise when it’s -30 out?  But spring is the time for growth and new beginnings.  

Luckily I’ve spent the winter catching up on those small miserable, boring jobs like filing two years worth of household paperwork and finally archiving photos, not to mention getting the 10 year old films I found, developed.   I have a few other small projects left to complete, but they are coming along well, so now I ponder what will my spring cleaning entail?  Yeah, sure I’ll clean the windows and sweep the garage and when the snow disappears there’ll be yard work, but I think this week I’ll be planning a different kind of spring cleaning.

I want a cleaning of the mind, spirit and soul.  I want to spend this time of rebirth clearing out the last of the negative thoughts that hang over me and I want to replace them with more fulfilling and empowering thoughts.  I want to clean out the guilt over mistakes made and let go of the past.  I want to forgive those who’ve harmed me and hope they find a better way.  So this week will be about making a list of these things that need to be cleared from my life and either sent to the dump or recycled into newer, more useful things. 

 

My challenge for you is to come up with one thing each day this week that you want to clean up and clear out of your mind, body and soul.  Become aware of the negative self talk, the nagging thoughts of guilt or mistakes.  Write them down each day, and then at the end of the week, think of a way to release them.  You may try calling people you want to forgive, or even writing them a letter, even if you never mail it.  Make a list of empowering self talk to replace the negative things you say to yourself.  If it feels overwhelming at first, just resolve to pick one thing to clean up and clear out.  Each step is one in the right direction and will help you in this season of rebirth and growth.  This spring, make spring cleaning about you.  The windows and garage can wait a week or two, but you shouldn’t.

Take care everyone and send me your spring cleaning list if you'd like help figuring out how to clean up.

On days like this, we should all be grateful for what we have

With the people of Japan in my thoughts today, I want to write about gratitude.  Each of us never knows when our lives will be swept away, sometimes literally.  Today is a good day to start thinking about what you are grateful for, but it shouldn’t be just today.  This is something each of us should do every day.  You can write in a gratitude journal at the end of the day or maybe you can post on Facebook, or tweet about something you for which you are grateful.  Perhaps it is just taking a moment in the day to think and contemplate all you have.

I started the morning and discovered my husband had forgotten to make the kids' lunches.  The van was out of gas and my daughter slipped on the ice and fell in water.  I filled up with gas and for some reason, the pump put in premium gas at $1.31 a litre instead of the already high regular gas at $1.22 (and I was filling the van which holds about 90 litres!)  Then the puddles soaked my boots and socks.  Ugh!  It was the beginning of a less than stellar day.

I’d heard mention of the earthquake on the radio, but it wasn’t until I got to the office and saw the images and video that I appreciated the severity of this tragedy.  Suddenly, my day seemed pretty good in comparison.  So today I’m taking time to be thankful for my husband, my kids, my family and friends.  I’m grateful for everything I have and everything I’ve been able to achieve.  I’m grateful to all those who have helped me along the way and to those that will enter my life and continue to help me.  I’m grateful for my health and for the country we live in where healthcare is universal and I know that no matter how bad things get, there is a support network that can help.  I am grateful I live in a city where Mother Nature is relatively kind.  I am grateful for a tsunami warning system and the technology and commmunications that allowed Hawaii to be prepared.  

There are some things we can’t control as we saw today in Japan, but there are so many things we can do to make every day count.  Don’t let life just happen.  Take charge and make it everything you want it to be.    Be grateful for everything you have and don’t let another day go by without telling those you love how grateful you are for them.  Live your life experiencing more, enjoying more and being more than you are today, because you never know when your world will change. 

From gratitude, you will find peace, calm and serenity. 

My thoughts are with all those in Japan and the family and friends who have lost loved ones or are waiting for news from those still missing.  

Above and Beyond

One sure path to success is to go above and beyond.  Go above and beyond what your boss expects of you at work, go above and beyond what you spouse expects of you in your relationship and even more importantly, go above and beyond what you expect of yourself.

Going above and beyond at work doesn’t necessarily mean putting in extra hours, although working through the occasional lunch or staying late to help your boss out is reasonable.  It is doing your job with 110% effort and being proactive when most of the staff just shows up.  Even if you think your boss doesn’t notice your hard work or the extra care, rest assured that others in the organization will.  

Going above and beyond for your spouse can be as simple as picking up their dry cleaning for them, or taking care of a chore you know they dislike.  This doesn’t mean you should do everything all the time, but doing something that makes them feel loved and special will be appreciated.  Going above and beyond may involve something as simple as stopping and really listening to your spouse when they are talking to you.  Good communication is about listening more than talking.  So go above and beyond and make your husband or wife feel like they are the most important person to you.  The reward will be a stronger bond and a more stable relationship.

Now for the most important- going above and beyond your own expectations. What do you expect of yourself?  Often people don’t really know.  Expectations imply a plan or goal and many people don’t expect much of themselves beyond actually showing up at work.  In truth, the more we expect of ourselves, the more we can accomplish.  As a child, did you have dreams of whom or what you’d be in life?  Did you have any reason not to believe it would happen?  Usually as kids we think we can do anything, but somewhere along the lines we lose those beliefs and lower our expectations of ourselves based on experiences, on what others have said about us, on stereotypes or on grades achieved in school.  These factors do not determine what you can do so expect more of yourself.

Why not raise the expectations of yourself a little bit each day?  Like the athlete training for the high jump, they don’t start with the bar raised to the top.  They start low and practice their technique and then gradually raise the bar.  You can do the same with your life.  I’m raising my bar a little by cutting out procrastination and taking more action.  These are little things and some days I may run face first into the bar, but I will try again and again.  I expect gradual, continual improvement of myself and will go above and beyond to exceed my expectations.  

Go above and beyond for yourself and others and the rewards will come!

Failed attempts? Or not?

Have you decided to break a habit or change something in your life?  Some of my friends have given up certain things for Lent and today, on day one, wrote and said they’d already failed.  What do you do when you fail at something?  Many will try something once and then give up when they fail or “fall off the wagon”.  The inner voice tells us “See I told you, you couldn’t do it, so just cut your losses and stop now”.  The problem is that voice often comes from a negative force in our life, past or present and we have to learn to ignore it.  

Tonight I went to my first Toastmasters meeting and I contributed by speaking about the “Table Topic”.  This is when you are given a sealed question to answer and you have only 90 seconds to prepare your mini 90 second speech.  My old inner critic would have said “Fail” as soon as I finished speaking because my speech was not very interesting or cohesive.  Luckily, my new critic is much more forgiving and is happy for the chance to try, to see how I stand up under pressure and gain a little valuable experience.   I didn’t have to speak tonight, but decided to do it anyway.  I pushed a little outside the comfort zone and spoke in front of a group of strangers who all have more experience speaking than I, and I survived.  To me, as a first time Toastmaster, this was actually a success.  It’s all about how you look at it and I’d prefer to see the positive side.

When you fail or are rejected, the old motto of try, try, try again holds true.  It is only with perseverance that you will ultimately achieve success.  Change your perception of failure.  Think of your failed attempts as lessons learned and then move on to the next attempt.  

The truth is that you have only truly failed when you stop trying!

Pancake Tuesday-Shrove Tuesday

Whether or not you are religious this might be a good time to think about giving something up for Lent.  According to Wikipedia and my vague recollections from a first year Religion class, pancakes were made to use up the eggs, fat and sugar in the house for a final feast before giving up such things for Lent.

As a step towards improving your life why not use this occasion to give up something.  If your goals are to be healthier, then you could give up fast food, or chocolate.  If you have bad habits, this might be a good time to break those.  Decide to stop watching one television show a night and replace the time with a more productive activity.  Perhaps you could exercise or read a book.  

Why not give up the negative thoughts or critical self talk that may be holding you back?  We spend so much time with voices in our head telling us that we can’t do certain things, that our boss will say no to our request, that we’re too fat or not smart enough.  Give up this self defeating behaviour and turn over a new leaf.  Every time you catch yourself thinking something negative, write it down.  Then write down the opposite and repeat the more positive statement to yourself.  

If you decide to give up a bad habit, make sure you have enough leverage to keep up with it and have a support network of people around you.   I’ve posted things on Facebook and when having trouble keeping up with it I’d mention that and immediately get supportive and encouraging comments from my friends and family.  My bad habit is procrastinating and waiting until I have no other choice but to finish whatever I was suppose to do.

So, I’m going to give up procrastinating.  Luckily it’s still Tuesday, so I can put that off until tomorrow.

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